Murciélago
by redspanishpulpo
Summary: AU where several of the nations are supernatural beings on top of being countries. After centuries of keeping it a secret, Spain is resolved to tell his favorite henchman about his and his two friend's vampiric nature... spainxromano with some fun-loving BTT on the side!
1. A Pleasant Surprise?

_I'm not one to write much about vampires and such, but a friend suggested this idea and I took it and ran with it and so then this happened XD_

_Enjoy~_

_(__The characters don't belong to me sadly. And beware of Romanito's potty language! :o )_

* * *

Spain really was never one to care much for immortality. He could've lived the regular lifespan of the average Spaniard and he would've been as happy and cheerful as ever.

But he already had immortality through being a nation anyway, so why did he also have to deal with this fate?!

_I've always thought bats were cute~! So when I was little and one bit me, I didn't think much of it. I forgave it and moved on. _

_And, as you know, I've always been appreciative of food. I love cooking, and I love eating~!_

_I've also always loved red things. And I've always loved eating red things. Tomatoes, watermelons, strawberries, gazpacho, sangria, jamón serrano…all red things~! _

_And even back in my conquistador days, I was always surrounded by blood. Red blood. I thought it was normal to lick it off of the tip of your axe and enjoy the tasty flavor of victory!_

_So when I began to thirst for blood, I suppose it took me a little longer than the average person to realize something might be wrong with me. Something like…you know…that the bat from so long ago might've been more than just your average bat. That it might've been…a vampire. A vampire that I am now, and have been for a long while, whether I was aware of it or not. And now you're aware of it too ~ _

_Heheh…_

Spain sighed hopelessly, throwing his arm over his eyes as he lay on his sofa.

_He'll never believe me. _

"Oh, why am I even trying?" No matter how much he rehearsed his little confession, he couldn't quite perfect it. This was for Romano, so it simply _had_ to be perfect. This is a delicate subject; even the smallest mistake could ruin everything!

Ay, he felt like a teenager rehearsing his love confession speech before knocking on the door to his little tomato's house.

But twenty minutes later he wasn't knocking on the door of his favorite henchman's house, no. Instead, he was knocking on the door of an office inside a hospital in downtown Madrid. Not exactly his preferred place to visit, of course, but it was still a necessary trip.

"Ah! Señor Carriedo!" The man sitting at the desk stood up and greeted the nation with a warm handshake.

"Doctor Martín! It's good to see you again!" Spain shook back with a grin.

"Well, well, are you here for your monthly dose?" The doctor said as he winked at the fellow Spaniard.

Spain nodded. "Of course~! I was getting a bit hungry, and you know what they say~ better safe than sorry!"

After receiving his plastic bag filled with a liter of donated human blood, more than enough to satisfy him for the month, he happily thanked his doctor and headed back to his house in a much slower and much more relaxed pace. He strolled through the streets of Madrid, humming to himself now that he'd obtained a replenishment of his blood supply. This loud humming of his, however, kept him from realizing that his phone was ringing for a solid minute, so once he finally realized the perfect melody was coming from his pocket rather than from his lips he hurried to clumsily answer the very patient person who was still waiting on the other side of the call.

"_Diga_~?"

"_Mon ami_! What took you so long to pick up the phone?!"

"Ah! Hola amigo! Ahaha, lo siento~ I thought the phone's melody was my humming again~!"

An amused sigh was clearly heard on the other side of the line. "You should change your ringtone then, Prussia and I always say that! Anyway~ You didn't pick up your house phone, does that mean you're out getting your…_tomato juice~_?"

Spain chuckled at the nickname he and his two vampire friends had agreed on (which he'd proposed, of course~), and nodded happily, forgetting that France wasn't able to see the gesture. "Of course! It's that time of the month again~!"

France chuckled in what could be considered a slightly disturbing manner. "Ah, _Espagne_, you sound just like the delicious ladies that I _enjoy_~ Are you sure you don't want to join in on the fun sometime~?"

Spain frowned in confusion for a moment, unsure of how the subject had suddenly changed to France's clueless victims, but then smiled his characteristic grin again. "You know I love having fun with you and Prussia, amigo, and it's nice of you to offer to share and all, but how many times to I have to tell you? Unlike the two of you, I don't need to drink the blood of virgins~"

"_Oui_, I know, I meant…ah, never mind…" France groaned in a disappointment that was all too common to him. Oh well, there's always next time. "Well, I called to remind you that our lovely vampire trio is going out to our favorite bar tonight, hmm~? I hope you show up, _mon ami_, even if you join us on a full stomach…it's less fun with just a vampire duo that's missing it's third member and his…two lush, beautiful vampiric buns~"

"Buns? Francia, I told you I went to the hospital, not the grocery store! I don't have any b- OH!" Spain laughed cheerfully at his friend's oddly sexual tone, believing to have realized what his friend meant. "I keep on telling you, _amigo_, even though I don't use them on any victims, my fangs are just as sharp as yours or Prussia's~!" As usual, he briefly wondered why France thought his fangs looked like buns…

France chuckled perversely. "_Oui, oui_, your…fangs~ Well, I'm going to go and see if I can get a head start on finding some dinner~ See you tonight, _mon ami_~!"

"_Hasta luego, amigo_!" Spain grinned and returned the phone to his pocket, continuing to walk and hum. For another good minute he noticed his voice seemed to sound a little odd, until he realized that, once again, someone was calling. He whined at having his humming be interrupted a second time, but when he checked the caller ID, his expression changed drastically, and he picked up his phone faster than the speed at which France picks up women.

"ROMANIITOOO~!"

Sadly, Spain had been humming for too long, so he had to settle for listening to his henchman's cute voice through the voicemail.

"Oi bastard, why the fuck won't you pick up your damn phone?! In any case, I found a bunch of old shit of yours in a chest lying around the house I share with _fratello_. I'd make you come and get it, but the potato bastard's here again and I want out, so I'm coming over, so don't act all surprised when I get there, _capisci_? And by the way I forgot my key so you better not be sleeping siesta or something because I refuse to wait outside holding all of your shit!"

Spain could hear the abuse Roma's phone went through as it got harshly hung up and the call ended. He quickly got over it, though, and basked in the gleeful news that Romanito was on his way to visit him.

_Ayyy~! Romanito is on his way to visit me~! Romanito is on his way to-_

He then noticed the plastic bag he was carrying.

_Mierda._


	2. Failed First Attempt

The slippery blood-bag nearly fell to the ground when Spain's motor neurons momentarily failed. Two words repeated themselves in his head as he froze and stared blankly at his tomato-blood-red phone.

_Ay dios. _

_Ay dios ay dios ay dios ay dios._

He was definitely not ready for this.

Now, it was true that Spain had never felt a burning passion for digging his fangs into any unsuspecting victims, which was odd enough considering that he was the most passionate of the friendly vampiric trio comprised of him, France, and Prussia. However, when it came to Romano, for some reason he always had to show a little self-restraint.

And self-restraint for any southern European nation is not easy; it's like asking Greece to stop taking so many naps, Romano to watch his language, Italy to manage his usage of boiled water, or France to stop flirting with (and subsequently drinking the blood of) at least five ladies a night.

On an empty stomach, it's virtually impossible.

Suddenly afraid to move, Spain looked down at the bag with wide eyes. The first thought that came to mind was to drink the entire bag right there and then, but he quickly realized that the idea was a bit silly; after all, he wasn't capable of drinking a month's worth of blood in time to get to his house before Romanito would get mad!

In fact, Romanito was probably already mad after the time it took Spain to think up of that idea…

Once he realized that the longer he stood there, the greater the level of Romano's wrath would be, Spain decided to stop thinking and finally managed to get a move on. He still wasn't really sure what to do about the bag of blood, but he figured he would be able to improvise.

Probably.

Hopefully.

He tried not to think too much about it…_thinking too much causes headaches and forehead creases the size of England's eyebrows!_

Having properly convinced himself, he nodded resolutely and with a resolved step (which eventually inevitably turned into a skip) he hurried back to his house.

As expected, Romano was impatiently waiting for Spain's return, seated on top of an old chest, playing with the patterns on the box and mumbling swears in Italian. Spain praised himself on his accurate prediction and walked over with a huge cheerful smile, absolutely captivated by everything that is his henchman, so consumed in these thoughts of cuteness that he momentarily forgot about the bag he was carrying.

"Romanitooo~! Thank you so much for bringing the stuff~! I'm so happy you came over to visit~!" He spoke through his joyful expression, spreading his arms out wide in the crazy hope that maybe the Italian felt like a hug today.

Sadly, as usual, that wasn't quite the case. "Yeah, yeah, _ciao_ to you too, you slow bast-…." Romano's expression changed considerably when his eyes focused on Spain's hands. "….the fuck is that?!"

Still grinning, Spain tilted his head questioningly. "What's what?" He followed Roma's gaze, and when he finally looked down at his spread out arms, his smile immediately faded and his eyes went as wide as they could go. He began to laugh nervously in a panic, because _ay dios see this is what happens when you don't think about things beforehand! How does this always happen?! What were you thinking?!_

A million thoughts ran through his head, impeding any actual words from coming out of his mouth. With each passing second, Romano simply got more and more suspicious of the Spaniard, though honestly, he was already starting to get used to these sorts of things. The bag full of blood, however, was definitely new…he raised his eyebrow and promised himself that if the bastard didn't explain himself in 10 seconds, he'd go slap him out of it.

Luckily, it wasn't necessary for him to take that perhaps-not-so-drastic measure, because by the seventh second, Spain finally got an idea and came back to his senses. Lying was clearly not an option for the man who was too honest for his own good, but that made him realize that perhaps it was finally time to say out loud the speech he'd been rehearsing for months!

Reassured and determined, Spain lowered his arms and stood straight. This only managed to leave Romano even more unnerved, but right as the Italian took a step forward to slap some sense into the idiot, Spain raised his free hand; a move which, being so unusual like all of Spain's actions the past minute, made Romano actually obey and freeze in place.

"The fuck is going on, _Spagna_…"

Spain cleared his throat, and spoke the first word with resolve. "Romano."

Once that word was spoken, both nations fell into a silent panic. Romano was freaking out because Spain had actually used his full name, no "cute" nicknames, and as much as he appreciated that, he also realized it meant Spain was being _SERIOUS_, and that damn cheerful bastard getting _SERIOUS _for once in his fucking life was just creepy.

Meanwhile, Spain's head had become a complete mess. He tried to remember his speech as accurately as possible, but after the first word was spoken, the more he tried to remember, the worse it got.

"Uh…um…I've…always…bats…cute…that is…food!...red things, you know? I uh…well that is…I love it! And the blood…it's donated I swear…and I always…well I'm-"

Romano, no longer in a panic and much more unimpressed after Spain's word salad display, simply raised his hand. "Save it. Just save it." He raised his eyebrow. "You're acting really fucking strange, and I don't wanna know about your weird red-thing fetishes okay?! You must've been away from your stupid turtles for too long or drinking too much wine with your bastard friends or some shit, so just save it and open the damn door. I've been waiting here for too fucking long already." Even after saying those words, Romano continued to stare at the bag for as long as it was in his field of vision. _I swear, this guy is more and more messed up each day._

As soon as there was another available topic of conversation, Spain was more than willing to latch on to it. He realized his attempt of the explanation, the one he'd spent so much time rehearsing, had been a failure yet again, and it was a relief to be able to move on quickly to something else. "Actually, I haven't gone out with my friends just yet, but we did plan to meet up tonight! France called, it was so nice of him to remind me~! I almost forgot!" He hurriedly went to open the door, hoping to store away the bag of blood as quickly as vampirically possible so that hopefully they could both forget about the incident and move on. He laughed loudly and happily, feeling childishly that his joyful laughs could drown away his previous failed words.

Someday, someday, he would explain everything to Romano properly.

* * *

_Hey guys~! Hope you all enjoyed the fic so far~ Let me know if you'd like me to continue! :)_


End file.
